Personal Update: I'm Going To Be A Father
Life Changing News That Will Inevitably Effect This Newsletter
I’ve been talking all year about, “Man plans, God laughs,” and it feels like life has decided to test me on that in the most unexpected way possible. Back in late June, my wife and I got the kind of news that changes your life, we found out we’re pregnant. Baby Mendez, a girl, is due in late February of next year.
If you’ve been reading me for a while, you know I’ve always been pretty open about my personal life. Over the years I’ve written about my hopes for the future of this newsletter, my struggles with weight, the burnout that forced me to take a break from writing earlier this spring, and even the little over a year-long separation from my wife that took us to the brink. I’ve shared all that because inevitably, what happens in my personal life directly affects how I watch films, how I review them, and how often I can sit down to update this newsletter.
And now there’s no getting around the fact that becoming a dad is a massive, life-changing event. On top of that, my wife is going back to college to earn a new certification, which means I’m the only one in a position to bring in full-time income. Things are already tight, and they’ll only get tighter once our little girl arrives. We’re basically running out the clock until next year, when (hopefully) we’ll be able to get our feet under us financially and start making some real progress. I’ve been hunting for a better-paying day job, but with the economy the way it is under this already disastrous second Trump administration (thanks fellow Americans), the search hasn’t exactly been encouraging so far.
But if there’s one thing I’ve learned about myself, it’s that I always find a way to keep moving forward, even when the odds stack up. My passion for film and this community has carried me through burnout, financial stress, and everything in between. Still, the reality is that the financial strain and the responsibility of being there for my pregnant wife have already made it harder for me to attend press screenings this year. And with a newborn in the mix, that’s only going to happen more. Which brings me to the part where this personal news becomes relevant for you, my readers, and for the podcasting I do.
For the rest of this year, nothing changes. I’m still on track to hit my usual 200+ films logged on Letterboxd; a streak I’ve kept up since I started seriously delving into and writing criticism at the turn of this decade. But next year? That’s going to look very different. I’ll likely only be able to cover the biggest releases and the most crucial awards contenders, and even then, I may not be able to catch them all right at release.
As for the podcast, things will shift even more. The main episodes with me and my twin brother will have to go on hiatus for a while, come next year. Dan Skip Allen will be taking the reins on season two of Reel Consideration and will steer it all the way through the aftermath of the 98th Academy Awards. Since the baby is due right in the heat of awards season, my involvement will be limited for those shows - especially post-nominations.
Written reviews will also scale back. Once we get into the late stages of pregnancy and those first few postpartum months, I’ll likely be down to one film review a week (if that), with another small break coming after the Oscars (similar to the one I took earlier this year). I’ll still keep up with my Oscars projections, but you can expect a longer pause than usual before I start laying out predictions for the 99th ceremony of 2027. I do plan on putting together some “Best Of” lists covering each year of the 2020s so far; my hope is to get those out by the end of this year or early next year. I’ll also be open to continue being a guest on others’ podcasts when I can be on. But overall, there’s no sugarcoating it that output is going to slow down, sometimes significantly.
That said, my passion isn’t going anywhere. Film reviews, Oscars coverage, “Best Of” retrospectives, all those will still be here, even if less frequently. I just want to be upfront about the realities of this massive life shift and what it means for this space in the next year or two.
And make no mistake that this baby, in my eyes, is nothing short of a miracle. My wife and I have struggled with infertility for over a decade. We went through years of frustration, a heartbreaking and expensive IVF attempt with a clinic that failed us, and of course the separation that nearly ended our marriage. To be here now, expecting a daughter, is something I never truly believed would happen. It feels surreal. As Jeff Goldblum put it in Jurassic Park, “Life finds a way.”
So here I am - excited, overwhelmed, blessed, nervous, stressed, and yes, even paranoid, staring down the adventure of fatherhood. It’s going to change everything, but I promise I’ll keep doing what I can to share my love of film with you along the way.