Review: Borderlands
INTRODUCTION
This is a quick review of the newly released film Borderlands. Keep in mind this is but one of the many movies I watch every year, and that whatever initial grade I come up for this film could change for better or worse with time. To better keep up to date with both my thoughts on other movies and if my feelings on this film changed, follow me on Letterboxd.
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THE PLOT
Via Letterboxd: A ragtag team of misfits embark on a mission to save a missing girl who holds the key to unimaginable power.
QUICK REVIEW
For years all I heard from my gamer friends was how ripe for a film adaptation Borderlands was. Mad Max meets Guardians Of The Galaxy is how it was always presented to me. Well that dream of theirs finally came to a fruition when director Eli Roth and crew went into production back in 2021. Now three post-production years of hell later, it’s finally come out for public eyes and its recieved some of the worst critical reviews of the year alongside some of the worst audience reviews of the year.
Which had me wondering, as someone who had never played a second of the game himself, was it really THAT bad? I mean it probably wasn’t a good sign that critic’s screenings were limited to just the major markets, leaving me in little old central Florida having to buy my own ticket. But given the reviews proclaiming this as one of the worst movies of all time, I had to see just how bad this was. Well…I’m here to report that while this wasn’t as bad as the word-of-mouth has hyped it up to be - it doesn’t mean I liked it either.
In fact, I would call this one of the most frustrating films I’ve ever seen; because I do think there is a significantly better and much more fun movie in this. But unfortunately a mixed showing from the cast, some incredibly lazy editing, mediocre pacing and writing, and an underwhelming soundtrack give us a final product that just doesn’t accomplish what this movie is trying to be.
Its wants to be as loudly stupid-fun as Godzilla X Kong: The New Empire is or as humorous as Deadpool & Wolverine is, but it doesn’t come close to landing like either of those movies. And granted those had their skeptics among critics, but audiences responded very well to those; having watched Borderlands I can see why they’ve turned on this one instead.
Let me get the few things I liked about it out of the way first: I do think there was care in trying to make the lore, characters, costumes, and production design close to what the video game plays like. Based on what i’ve been told or have seen from marketing or clips of the game, they also generally nailed the personality of the source material. While I never laughed once watching this, I did get the jokes they were going for a few times. I didn’t cringe as much as I did watching other video game to film adaptations. I didn’t find this as boring as I did say Five Nights At Freddy’s or as insulting to the source material (the little I’m aware of) as Monster Hunter. I also think some of the cast, mainly Cate Blanchett and Ariana Greenblatt, are really trying their best to elevate the mediocre material they’ve been given to work with.
But all that can’t save the movie from constantly tripping over itself. Kevin Hart is miscast in his role, and this is the second time this year (Netflix’s Lift being the other film) I’ve watched him try to play a straight action role that just doesn’t suit him. The soundtrack which is supposed to enhance the personality of the movie is underwhelming. The pacing feels like there was excessive editing done on the cutting room floor. The score is nonexistent. The villains are more forgettable than the mid-tier MCU baddies. The green screen gets wonky at times. The action scenes are dull. The dialogue is rough. When the credits rolled, I found myself already forgetting the movie.
But I can’t say this as horrifically bad as others have claimed. I’ve seen a good chunk of worse films this year. This was a mediocre empty calorie fast food cheeseburger, in comparison we’ve had some bore-fests that made me want to walk out or turn off my TV.
Overall do I think this having the super low critics scores that it has is over the top and hyperbolic? Yes. Do I think this is a good movie? No. Its the definition of a mediocre video game IP adaptation. Unless you’re a superfan of the source material, there’s really no point in watching this unless you’re curious enough to see it for yourself when it shows up on streaming services in the next year or two. I give Borderlands an initial mediocre grade of C+.
INITIAL GRADING
